Virtual Operation Barbarossa Versus Low-Life JEJEMONS!
I first encountered the term “JEJEMON” a few days ago when a Facebook friend wrote the following message on his wall: “Jejemon: Usually seen
around social networking sites such as Friendster and Multiply, jejemons are individuals with low IQs who spread around their idiocy on the web by tYpFing LyK diZS jejejeje, making all people viewing their profile raise their eyebrows out of annoyance. Normal people like you and me must take a Bachelor of Arts in Jejetyping in order to understand said individuals, as deciphering their text would cause a lot of frustration and hair pulling.”
The following day a Facebook friend LIKED an usual page named “Alam Kaya ng mga JEJEMONS na sila Mismo ay mga JEJEMONS???” When I checked the page I found out that it had 19,741 fans, so I thought that there must be some brewing internet uproar against the disturbing, unprecedented rise of Jejemons. I turned to Facebook search engine and discovered that a number of Facebook pages are committed to the annihilation or destruction of the whole “Jejemon” race. One facebook page— GOTTA KILL ‘EM ALL JEJEMON!— attracted 63,111 fans while another page— JEJEMON HATERS—had 8,610 supporters and counting.
I sympathize with these groups because I noticed how these JEJEMONS unwittingly or wittingly attempt to massacre the English language with their deteriorating mental and physical condition, outrageous anti-spelling techniques, and sickening ‘grammatical ways.’ Even before the Facebook ‘virus’ hit online addicts in the Philippines, I noticed some of my friends who spread their annoying jejemonish habit via text messaging. A text message like— iM sO SoRrY, gUyS, i cAn’T gO w/H YoU. hAv LoTs oF ThInGs tO Do— was annoying enough to ruin my day. I cannot imagine how they manage to torture their texting-finger only to produce such a freakish, sick text message. Call it innate talent or bizarre texting skills, but I cannot imagine myself typing alternate upper and lower case letters on my keypad.
Here’s how urbandictionary.com defines JEJEMON:
1) Usually seen around social networking sites such as Friendster and Multiply, jejemons are individuals with low IQs who spread around their idiocy on the web by tYpFing LyK diZS jejejeje, making all people viewing their profile raise their eyebrows out of annoyance. Normal people like you and me must take a Bachelor of Arts in Jejetyping in order to understand said individuals, as deciphering their text would cause a lot of frustration and hair pulling.
CAUTION: THESE INDIVIDUALS ARE BREEDING! THEY CAN BE SEEN WRECKING GRAMMATICAL HAVOC ON FACEBOOK TOO!
2) Jejemons are not just confined to trying-hard Filipino gangsters and emos. A Jejemon can also include a variety of Latino-Hispanic fags who enjoy typing “jejejejeje” in a wider context, much to the disdain of their opponents in an internet MMORPG game such as Ragnarok and DOTA.
On AIM or YM:
miSzMaldiTahh111: EoW pFuOh!
miszMaldiTahh111: i LLyK tO knOw moR3 bOut u, PwfoH. crE 2 t3ll mE yur N@me? jejejejeje!
You: You are a jejemon! Don’t talk to me, you uneducated retard!
Here’s a clearer, more precise definition of Jejemon:
*JEJEMON- a person WhO tyPeZ lYKeS tH1s pfOuh.. whether you are RICH, MIDDLE CLASS or POOR ifpK eU tYpE L1K3 tHiS pfOuh..eU are CONSIDERED AS JEJEMON.
*JEJEMONIS M- the syndrome of typing in stciky caps,wrong grammar and adding unnecessary letters. (BUT, if you only type in STICKY CAPS, that is ok if it’s still readable )
WHAT ARE THE SIGNS OF JEJE PEOPLE? Sign that it is a jeje you are dealing with is that he (they are most commonly masciulin) seems to have low intelligence.
I don’t know with some people but to me, new technologies like the Internet and modern communication devices can help improve our knowledge if we only knew how to properly use them. A lot of people, particularly the do-gooders, blame new communication technologies for the continued ‘idiotation’ and the spread of ignorance and stupidity among young people today, but it seems they simply missed the point. If these do-gooders really know what they’re talking about, they should stop putting the blame on these new communication devices that make our lives more comfortable and safer for the stupidity of some under-developed homo sapiens. Instead they should try to understand why most young people behave in such a way and have been inflicted with the pandemic Jejemonsis virus.
One reason is that most, if not all, Jejemons are nihilists. Sometimes it is difficult to distinguish Jejemons from Jologs or rugby addicts. These are the kind of people whose level of intelligence is a little bit higher than that of an animal. The main difference between a human being and an animal is the ability to form concepts. Animals do not have the capacity to improve their perceptual level to conceptual level. However, these Jejemons are a little big higher in degree than animals, because somehow they have the capacity to form abstractions, albeit in a freakish, hippyish way.
Another reason is that most, if not all, Jejemons do not believe that ‘thinking’ is important. When confronted, they would simply say: “wHo aM i tO ThInK? i dOn’T kNoW wAt D hElL uR tAlKiN aBoUt, FrEaK!” They don’t care about ideas. Heck! they don’t even know the value of ideas to their lives. They just subconsciously consider that ideas are impractical and just consist of unrelated words or jumbled gibberish.
It’s really annoying how they try to pervert and murder language. The Jejemons’ are indeed the new sub-species of underdeveloped homo sapiens who live in a hippyish, jejemonish Orwellian world. They have contrived their own spelling and grammatical styles that can be easily understood by members of their sub-human tribe. They have their own newspeak, so to speak, which is almost an alien to our civilized, modern world.
And this brings me to a very interesting observation by an annoyed blogger, TJ’s Daily. In his blog article ‘Jejemon: What Are They?’ TJ’s Daily came up with a very intelligent, informative analysis of this new variation of “homo sapiens sub-species,” to wit:
A Jejemon is basically a variation of homo sapiens sub-species Jeje that originates in the Asia-Pacific island nation the Philippines. Jejes on the other hand are of the pure and original form and is claimed to have originated in what we know today as Latin America. This post will discuss the Jejemon strain of the Jejes.
Jejemons (Jejemonus Filiponensis) are creatures of the night. Their activity period ranges from 8pm to 4am local time. They have been discovered by the world-renowned Filipino adventurer Juan dela Cruz in the early start of the millennium.
It is said that Jejemons are often seen clustering around social networking sites such as Facebook and Friendster. They are also spotted in massive numbers in television chat rooms albeit they were just starting to flourish at the time of Juan dela Cruz’s discovery of them. To date, there is an estimated 7.4 million Jejemons thriving in the Philippines. They have since started booming proportionally with the fast global progress of technology.
t is difficult to distinguish Jejemons from normal human beings solely by physical appearance. They look like human beings, they eat like human beings, they dress like human beings (see: gangster). A Jejemon can only be distinguished by their writing language, the Jejebet. The Jejebet is a combination of the English alphabet and counting numbers which, in a strange mix of character substitution, surprisingly makes words that are understandable only to the Jejes and Jejeologists (normal people that study Jejemons).
Jejemons are generally thought to have very low IQs, although this claim still remains unproven. This might be due to the failure of the Jejebrain to produce and terminate brain cells than that of the normal rate of average human beings. Extreme head heat (which have been thought to decrease brain size) while wearing gangsta caps and gangsta shirts and 24/7 beer diets have been also attributed for the Jejemons’ low IQ levels.
Below are some of the basic Jejemon words (Warning: May cause severe headache if you try too hard to understand. Patience and comprehension is required):
aQcKuHh – means me/ako
lAbqCkyOuHh – means I love you
yuHh – means you
jAjaJa – garbled words conveying laughter
jeJejE – a variation of jAjaJa; conveys sly laughter
iMiszqcKyuH – means I miss you
eEoW pFhUeEhsxz – means hi/hello
(Credits to Jejeologist Dharwin Chaarlez for the above)
Are the Jejeologists and their trying-hard, jolog lexicographers trying to introduce a new way of conveying words and written texts to online users? Well, let me tell you that this sub-species of underdeveloped homo sapiens— perhaps they should be categorized as homo jejemonsis— are disgusting! They are insufferable!
However, thanks to the grammar nazis and anti-Jejemon police forces who continue to patrol, report, and suppress the illegal activities of these Jejemons who are indeed ‘enemies of civilization.’
In regard to the case the Jejemons, we should all be grammar Nazis, but I do not advocate the complete annihilation of the Jejemons. If you see one, round this Jejemon up and bring him/her to language authorities. Here are the suggestions I gathered from members of anti-Jejemon Facebook groups:
- Bring the Jejemons back to preschool and then teach them proper spelling and grammar;
- Jejemons must be branded as ‘undesirable’ elements in our virtual society so that they may be informed of their crimes;
- Report them to active grammar/spelling Nazis online!
- Invite them to join anti-Jejemon Facebook groups;
- Drive them out of Facebook until they rejoin their fellow Jejemons on Friendster;
- Try to warn them.
Operation Barbarossa was the code name for Nazi Germany’s invasion of the Soviet Union during World War II that began on 22 June 1941.